My Mothers Mess

I don’t know if its the stillness I am forced into right now, from a broken foot, or if its just my normal anxiety and insecurities.

We were supposed to go to JB’s for the weekend, some time to get to know each other, let the kids run outside, fish. We were leaving Friday. But Wednesday I woke up in excruciating pain in my foot and off to the Dr.s I went. Stress fracture, just what I need to muck up my plans!

Now I am sitting here full of all these emotions and feelings. I am worried that JB and his wife will be mad that we “wasted” their time by saying we’re coming, then not. I am feeling bitter and cheated out of having not known about this side of my family sooner.

I have a sister only a few hours away, whos children could be wonderful cousins to my own. My children have an aunt we could easily day trip to.

I have another sister, who may very well be my soul twin! When I see her FB posts its like she is me, in a different time and place. We both love to craft, care deeply about people, are generous, and lost to restore things. I feel so cheated when thinking about the time missed with this sister.

I know life works as it supposed to, and I have faith in the universe. We were put together at the right time, I suppose. But some days it sucks. And today, while I am laid up on the couch, all I can do is think about the sucky’ness of it all!